Two annoying girls moved into the apartment above me.
I'm forced to hear every dumb thing they say.
These are my letters to them.
I'm forced to hear every dumb thing they say.
These are my letters to them.
09
“I’d never kiss a guy if he got me something from Kay. But jewelry from Tiffany, blow job fo sho.” I’d like to see that commercial.
You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.
Both comments and pings are currently closed.
ok, now that actually had me laughing out loud. I can see the commercial now!
How is she going to know the difference if it’s out of the box? What will she do then?
Oh, I bet these girls know their Tiffanys.
I think part of the appeal of getting something from Tiffany’s is the blue box their stuff comes in
Fo sho? Where did that come from?
I’m going to bet on Jersey Shore.
fo shizzle
my nizzle?
bo dizzle.
Bam sizzle…
why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella?
fo drizzle
I like how you replied to yourself just to leave the punchline.
Yes, it wouldn’t be right if it were on the same line. Well done :)
i’m all about the dramatic effects, what can i say
HAH.
You poor man.
But LMAO!
Tiffany & Co.
The “Co.” stands for “come.”
^^Like!
she sure doesnt have to think that long and hard huh.
It’d probably look like this..
Sorry guys, havin trouble with the video
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Ur2er-STls
Darling, hold out for a Harry Winston at least. Tiffany’s is really only worth a hand job.
Harry Winston is worth a fuck load more than a blowjob. I’m sure you’d be lucky to even get Tiffany.
S’cuse me? It’s called sarcasm, dear. ^_^
What I said was a joke too. But using degrading names like darling and dear make you look like a bitch.-That’s completely serious, “honey”.
Hm. Someone seems testy.
I think somebody (Maggie) doesn’t know what sarcasm is.
Whoa, since when is Darling or Dear a degrading name? I better think of something else to call my Sweetie…. Or maybe he likes being treated like my bitch ;-)
I love that ★
Honestly, I bet a LOT more guys would go out and buy jewelry after seeing that commercial than any of the super cheesy romantic ones on tv now. :-)
Lol, I wonder how they even got onto that subject!
I’d be excited if it meant that they were watching Family Guy, but I think it’s because of the sappy “every kiss begins with K” commercial.
Well, figure out what she’d do for a klondike bar and slowly up your ante from there!
Rofl! Like! >.<
Teleflora.
First off, are there really guys out there that will just buy a girl expensive jewelry just for a blow job? I’d think they’d want more action, or if they were humble, nothing at all. Oh well, both ends of the spectrum…
I just burst out laughing and scared my dog :)
[…] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Jennifer Lavery, Bruce Andrew Winters. Bruce Andrew Winters said: 2011-02-09 « Dear Girls Above Me http://bit.ly/dJf9H3 […]
HAHAHAHAHA.
Charlie, you should leave a Tiffany’s box outside their door and see how they react.
^Like
Yes! Do it! :D
These girls are always so classy
You should patent that.
Charlie will you love me? My boyfriend just broke up with me.
Well he’s an idiot. Send him to this site and we can all yell at him. Unless you cheated on him or something.
aww I don’t want you to yell at him. Then he’ll never want to talk to me. But thanks for the offer
Just a blowjob? Hm.
I really thought they’d be more generous than that.
How old are they? Really?
For once, I agree with the girls. Definitely would give a blowjob for some Tiffany’s jewelry.
It’s good to know that the girls have standards.
The new Tiffany’s tagline a la DGAM. “Our distinctive blue box guarantees your balls aren’t.”
that was freaking GENIUS!!! love it. :D
OMGs Cygnus! Like multiply by 100000000000000 to your comment!
I can imagine that being said in a British accent. Is that bad?
Don’t worry. I did too.
I imagined it with a British accent as well – brilliant tagline!!!
Oh my god! I busted up laughing when I read that. Creative genius.
What would they do if their boyfriends got them jewelry from Walmart? You’d probably have some really good fight quotes…
Your comments usually aren’t clever or interesting. Stop trying to be such an ego-fueled hipster, and start to contribute valuable thoughts to the internet.
Why are you here then? We like ego fueled wit-isms. Go away. :)
Thank you, and have a nice day.
Leisure Muffin by making that comment it shows your an opinionated ass.
Just because you don’t find this website funny doesn’t mean the rest of us don’t. Pull your head out off your own ass.
By using the incorrect form of “you’re” you are revealing to the world that you are an uneducated ass. So before you chastise another indivudal, please ensure that your own house is in order.
*individual
G.N., you would do well to follow your own advice.
Truth. not leisure muffin, not sure what crawled up your muffin and died. Just thought the statement was funny.
Leisure muffin, dont be a giant squid of anger (internet troll). He is contributing valuable thoughts to the internet. Seriously, every time ive had a crappy day in the last year i could come on this website and smile. So it might not be curing cancer, but its doing something simpler and much more important. Bringing smiles to people’s faces.
Leisure Muffin is probably Mit’s best friend. You are both not invited to our SunChip party. On another note, poem anybody?
“Every kiss begins with Kay”
Not for the girls, anyway.
But if their men want something more,
They should go to the Tiffany store.
Sure, it’s spending a lot of dough,
But in the end, they’re ready to blow…Fo sho.
Baha. Oh my, this one is now running for first place in my list of favorites. Alicia, you’ve done it again.
Alicia, best one yet.
I am humbled and delighted. Thank you!
Ha i know i’m 2 days late, but i loved this one!
bahahah <3 i love this one :)
Nerdfighteria FTW :)
I was reading the comments and the ad was for an online jewelry site. Mail-order jewelry… What would that be? Heehee:) As for leisure muffin: If you don’t like this site, you don’t have to look at it. So take your negative comments and go away before a giant narwhal stabs you in the brain.
Fact: Tiffany’s Jewelry origanally opened with the slogan “So good she will blow you away!” Followed by the slogan “This jewelry will get her to have sex with you!” a slogan that failed to get it’s message of romance across and was eventually changed to something more romantic.
Dear owner of this blog,
Everything you do is shit and I hope you die of cancer.
Signed,
Every single human being on Earth with creative talent
Im going to repeat this, dont be a giant squid of anger (internet troll). He is contributing something great to the internet. Seriously, every time ive had a crappy day in the last year i could come on this website and smile. So it might not be curing cancer, but its doing something simpler and much more important. Bringing smiles to people’s faces.
I think bad vibes like that get back to you, bud. I also disrespectfully disagree.
Really? I can bet twenty bucks that Leisure Muffin just changed the name he used on here so that he could pretend that more people hate this website.
If not, he just brought along a lame friend that is not welcomed. Silly trolls.
In Soviet Russia, Internet trolls You!
Dear Cory Doctorow,
All this trolling that you do is shit and I hope instead you will spend your time finding a cure for cancer.
Signed,
Every human being who visits this site every day for a good laugh.
oh come on. Cursing somebody with cancer? that’s a whole new level of meanness, man. and childishness.
on another note, I can never understand internet trolls. If you really, really, really hate a particular site, why do you bother commenting? Aren’t you just basically perpetuating what goes on, on the site? Of course you could just be really starved for attention. In that case, I kinda pity you. Go get a pet cactus or something.
Actually, she said to try to find a cure for cancer as in that he is not doing anything useful either and should leave the internet.
Please forget my comment. i misunderstood.
Okay that’s just extremely low.It’s one thing to express that you don’t like the site since you’re entitled to your opinion, even though a lot of people here would disagree with you, but it’s quite another to wish something like that on someone who’s done nothing to you just because you’re not a fan of their work. If you hate the site that much why’d you even bother to read and comment? That was a really terrible thing to say and if you ever do comment again it should be an apology.
P.S. I don’t think you should speak on behalf of people with creative talent, because I seriously doubt that you have any talent at all.
Fact: Don’t feed the trolls, they’re like cats. Keep feeding them and they will come back for more troll food. Don’t feed them and they will go back to their bridge.
PSA you are the unsung hero of the DGAM community
Really?? You want to spend your time wishing cancer on someone you don’t even know?? That’s messed up.
Whoa there, buddy. If this site offend you so greatly, then please GO AWAY and never ever “grace” our presence again. It’s called America, land of the FREE jerk. And quite honestly, we all have the right to freedom of speech thanks to all of those people who fought and died FOR that right and many more.
Secondly, WHAT THE HEY. Cancer? I hope that YOU experience the pain of having/knowing a close loved one who has cancer and never knowing if today is their last day.
What’s your problem? Is this something that’s fun for you?? I hope you actually get a life instead of deciding to just rag on others.
THIRDLY AND MOST IMPORTANTLY…
Um, excusez-moi?? I NEVER agreed to that statement of wishing cancer on poor Charlie. So, I’ll just keep me and my artistic talent right out of that petition, kay thanks.
Cory, if I get cancer you’re paying the bill.
I buy Jewelry for my girlfriend from Walmart. I get high fives. I’d prefer that over a blow job any day! :D!
High fives over blow jobs? If I were mean I’d ask if you also wore your own balls for earrings.
But seriously, I wish my ex boyfriend would have just accepted high fives.
viiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiirgin
Brett, you are my fave ;D
I so agree! Brett, why aren’t there more guys like you?
Nice vest
How’s the blog to twitter to book to TV show going? Good? You are one hella funny aspiring comedy writer fo sho! We’ll make millions!
Hahaha, the Kay commercial IS annoying but “fo sho”?? whaaaat?
At least Hilary Duff knows the proper way to respond to an engagement ring.
The Teacher Next Door… http://middleschoolwhat.blogspot.com/
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Ur2er-STls
…
Thank you for sharing this. I’m always looking for valuable resources to send to clients and my colleagues, and this article is definitely worth sharing!…
my name is actually sho. so SUCK IT!
It took me a while, but well played
She should have said “blow *jo’* fo’ Sho,” because then it would’ve all rhymed!
Um, just reading another website and they totally stole this. Darn the internet and its problems with copyright on intellectual property….
…
Respectable points!…
These girls are what’s wrong with the world.
I’ve seen this same joke on about 50 different sites now. I’m starting to think you live on the top floor and this is all fake.
I really do feel sad for my gender after reading all these posts…
Then again I feel happy for the entertainment they provide.
This is LA. There have to be cheaper ways to get a blowjob.