Two annoying girls moved into the apartment above me.
I'm forced to hear every dumb thing they say.
These are my letters to them.
I'm forced to hear every dumb thing they say.
These are my letters to them.
01
“He’s obviously gay, Claire. He texted you in the morning from a place called Peep Boys. Come on!” Shot in the dark, PEP BOYS?
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At least it wasn’t the Jiffy Lube
eww…
But if she believes that he IS gay, I’d say he dodged a bullet with this one.
I’m just wondering what Claire’s response be to THAT.
Okay…I’m totally having a GAM moment, but I do not understand this post. AT ALL.
Pep Boys is a store to get stuff for your car. I’m pretty sure they translated it wrong and thought he was at a gay strip club called Peep Boys.
Ohhhh! That explains it. I didn’t know what a Pep Boys was. Thanks.
Thanks for clarifying for us non Americans :)
Yup, I definitely didn’t understand either…maybe this is not the best example of their stupidity. Haha.
I didn’t understand it either at first, as I’m from the UK, so thanks for that =)
Obviously Pep Boys. Peep Boys wouldn’t be open in the morning.
hahah this is so funny!
Depends just how early it is.
Bwahaha those girls…
Well, lucky for him Cathy doesn’t seem to like him. xD
“Pep Boys does everything for less.” My, their slogan doesn’t help this situation in the least bit. Does it?
haha I didn’t even think of that, but now it’s making me laugh pretty hard :p
every time I hear their slogan now I’m gonna think of this
What if instead he had said “Big O” (referring to Big O Tires. I’ve been there…)
Hey, I’m a long-time reader, but a first-time commenter. (I heard that if we mention that, we get a prize.)
I had a snow day today, and I kept on checking back, hoping for a new DGAM post. So, yay!
Also, can you just imagine Claire talking to this guy? “I’m sorry, but I can’t be with you, because you’re gay.” “I’m not gay…?” “Hello! PEEP BOYS?! You’re totally gay!” “Um…I have a car…”
If I had a nickel for every time I’ve been in that conversation…
I once had a similar conversation with my ex. He ended up being gay. So, they might actually not be too off with this one…
1: The fact that you just responded to my comment has made my entire life. (Or, at least my snow day.)
2: hahaha I’m sure that you’ve been in that situation before…it’s a common one. I’ve known tons of gay guys who hang out at peep boys.
At least it wasn’t jiffy lube….
So Charlie…. they talking about you?
Maybe now she’ll start treating him like her gay bff. Poor guy
Charlie, don’t you get tired of the “I’m new here, you’re awesome” comments? Oh, and by the way, I’m new here and I think you’re awesome. I’ve come to join the family, just sayin’.
I’m not sick of it yet. The more the merrier!
I’m new here. Charlie, you’re awesome.
Welcome to the family Jacob!
I’m new here, you’re awesome!
Is Pep Boys a west coast thing? I’m an east-coaster (MA) and didn’t understand this one. =[
not really, im east coast also, they show the commercials all the time on the tv.
Weird. I’ve never heard of it.
I’ve never heard of it either…
i have never heard on if either, and im in Cali…
hmmm… then i think i watch too much tv.D:
Nope, there are pep boys at least some places on the east coast, there is one about 5 minutes up the road from me actually.
No it’s not a West-Coast thing. We have a Pep Boys in Manchester, CT.
I lived in Mass, and I think they had some ads for it on TV, but it’s probably in RI or CT or something. :P
Haha, this one could actually not be their fault. What if he accidentally did write ‘Peep’? It’d give me pause as well.
I wonder if he really meant peep boys. I mean, it’s LA so that is always a possibility.
Also, Charlie despite the fact that your from LA I imagine you with a very sarcastic tone, and an English accent. Is that odd?
We LA’ers are actually very sarcastic. But majority of us don’t have English accents, so that one is kind of weird, haha.
I know that much, I used to live there. I suppose the English accent part is the strangest part, but I was just saying that’s how I’d imagine Charlie’s voice.
My dad is English and I do have a British passport, but unfortunately no accent.
Is it weird that my mind gives him an english accent…though I am from england so i should know better lol
This reminds me of Elf when Santa warns Buddy not to go into any strip clubs with the title “Pep Show” because its not Christmas present you get to peak at
speaking of clubs may I join this one? I read the posts and comments every day but I never comment in fear of saying something stupid
I’m sure anything stupid you say will be quickly overshadowed by all the stupid things the DGAM say.
o my god i love elf its like the best movie ever
I agree, great movie. The mom is awesome in it.
Gee, Charlie, I wonder WHY you like the mom in Elf? ;D
No, that would be too logical.
I feel like such a creeper because I know a lot of you guys, but none of you really know me o.O
i know you ;) haha jk
Ha ha I thought that about me the other day
Great minds think alike, yes?
You should check if there’s a peep boys in LA. Theres a lotta homos there, right?
Nah I googled it, there’s no peep boys.
Well, my hopes and dreams have been crushed.
aww thats sad :'(
So. Serious question. Can I call you Chaz? or better yet, The Chaz-oid?
I’m sorry. I lol-Ed at your serious question. But it’s a good one.
You can call me that but I’ll probably only respond half of the time.
You only respond to everyone half of the time so I am perfectly fine with that, Chaz
Hey Chaz, the meaning of my name is, “female of Charles” so that means I’m your evil female twin!
Too dumb to realise it was an auto shop, the girls think he is gay,
Now Cathy won’t go out with him, thank God for him, anyway.
It’s an advantage for him that they read it wrong; a blessing in diguise,
Because if Cathy wanted to hang out with me, I think I’d rather die.
Baha, I love this poem. It’s in a tie for my favorite with the one about trees. :]
Thanks. The trees one is a personal favorite of mine.
Claire will never again give this John Doe the time of day,
because Cathy thinks that he’s absoulutely,positively gay.
What caused Cathy to come up with such a revelation?
Well it was simply just miscommunication.
They thought he said he was at Peep Boys,
a place where there’s gay men and weird sex toys.
Really he was at Pep Boys, a store you go to for your car.
It’s become obvious that their minds can’t expand very far.
Oh well, don’t feel too bad for this John Doe.
For tomorrow he’ll just call another ho.
Oops, *absolutely* not absoulutely.
It was actually Claire who wanted to hang out with him
Too dumb to realise it was an auto shop, the girls think he is gay,
Now Cathy won’t go out with him, thank God for him, anyway.
It’s an advantage for him that they read it wrong; a blessing in diguise,
Because if Claire wanted to hang out with me, I think I would rather die.
that was beautiful! :D
Woah. I didn’t mean to post that twice. And Taylor, that was amazing!
Thanks, I’m so glad you like it:) It’s been a rough week for me so far and I haven’t been able to come on the site the past few days and today I thought it’d be fun to try a poem as a comment, hope you don’t mind. I really enjoyed yours as well, as I always do.
Of course I don’t mind. It was a really funny poem and I hope your week goes better!
Thank you very much:)
Hey Charlie quick question, who’s hotter Claire or Cathy?
haha u gunna stalk them?
I’m just trying to picture this the way he does
hmm very logical…will this become a science fair project?
Nah I just wanna know if their slampieces or not
ok then andrew i salute your creepiness :) no seriously i do
Yoire kind of a weird kid aren’t you
perhaps…of course everyone has their own opinion
since when can you call me a ‘kid’?
I saw all those smiley faces in your comments and concluded I’m older than you. Since then
that one smily? so what now ppl can’t show their emotions? jk but u never know…i could be older
Really cause I counted four.
oh those…but since when do emoticons determine your age?
Since 13 year old girls started excessively using them
two things: 1) thirteen is teenager 2) im not. and i added a 3) im pretty sure everyone else on this site is now thoroughly annoyed at this conversation soo i’m ending it. goodbye
I love/hate both of them the same.
So you have no favourites… I call bullshit on that, leaders of cults always have their favourites (I would know.)
It’s Cathy, isn’t it? ;)
I sort of assumed Claire was his favorite. I suppose since he has no favorite we’re both right. Or both wrong, depending on how you wanna look at it.
I’m starting to get depressed because my homework and studying for tests is preventing me from coming on the site.
Charlie would it be weird if I asked you to marry me???
Haha just kidding… Unless you want to…
IS that weird?
If so sorry….
Oh dang. Now I feel like a psychotic stalker. Sorry
haha you’re funny i’ll cyber marry you :) jk
Where’s my ring? At least a hotpocket or something?
Depends on what kind of Hot Pocket.
(The philly cheese steak ones are delicious.)
Here Charlie
Did it show? I don’t know if emojicons show? I’m on my iPod so I hope so.
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA
Obviously the guy was getting his parts checked(;
Charlie, what would you do if the girls found out about this? I just hope you don’t have to migrate to the south of France, I heard its supppeeerr bird-y this time of year.
I would move into a huge house with everyone who comments on the site.
I would so not make those kind of comments, you’ll wake up to a crowd of DGAM fans one day trying to sabotage you so the girls find out
I commented, just so that I could move in with you. :)
I got to say I’m in the middle of the Snowpocalyse and reading this while having a Thundersnow is awesome :) and Charlie, i wonder if they ever talk about snow?
Are you in the States or has it finally hit Ontario? It should be in my area anytime now…
Yes, Canadians are obsessed with weather, we’ve been talking about this for like the past five days, and everytime I check the news, I’m checking the weather report.
oh im in the States…in Indiana to be more accurate. Canadians are awesome lol, but its so cool to be in a blizzard again with Thundersnow
i live in texas, and the temperature change from yesterday to today has been approx 50 degrees.
we haven’t had snow since i was in the fourth grade, so everyone here is up for some serious frolicing if there’s snow on thursday or friday.
we also plan on ditch sledding. (where i live, that’s the closest we can get to a hill)
how long ago was 4th grade for you ?
seven years.
a long time (by teenage standards i suppose)
or maybe i was a fifth grader, then it would have been six.
one of the two.
(like i said, it’s been a while)
wow i was an 8th grader 7 years ago…wow i feel old
*snerk* Yes, I do think that he dodged a bullet with that one.
Do I get officially welcomed if I’m a long-time reader of the posts and all the comments, but few-time commentator?
Also, Charlie, who’s your favorite commentator? ;) and don’t say Sasquatch.
Of course, welcome! Oh I don’t know. I love the whole family we’ve created.
Can I be part of the family? I swear I’ll give you a hotpocket. Scout’s honor.
Good family. I love you all. :D
Aww I hope I’m still part of the family since I haven’t posted in a while. Schools been crazy so I’ve been studying non stop for tests and such.
And if my emojicons show(the pictures) then I can proudly say I’ve already given you a ring.
On my marry me comment.
I love everyone too. But I’m not family, just the strange creep at the window :)
Lol, we love you too but there may have to be a restraining order.
There’s a difference?
No wonder I haven’t been invited to any family functions in a while…
Thanks for the clarification! I’m from NZ and I was feeling a little out of the loop on this one!
Hi! I’m a long-time reader first-time commentor. These stories from Charlie and comments from the readers make me laugh so hard! The GAMs don’t know what laughter, joy, and sarcasm they bring to the world! haha
Alicia — Do you know who Sarah Lancaster is? For some reason I always picture that you look like her.
We have the same hair color/length, but mine’s curly. I’m Spanish, but no one believes me when I tell them because I act like the whitest person on the planet.
I was raised in Mexico [though my family is also Spanish] but people don’t believe me because of my lisp when I speak Spanish. I stick to English, and let everyone think I’m white.
I felt the need to come out and say I’m another long-time reader but first-time commentor. This website gets me through my work day, it’s amazing.
Also, Charlie is any chance you were in DC this morning? If so, I’m really sorry for almost hitting you in the crosswalk.
Charlie, I don’t think I’ve seen you respond to so many of the comments from one post
Wow, I think this is one of my favorites so far. Half because that’s a funny mistake, and half because… what if they really ARE right, and he is at Peep Boys? Then what?!
We spend the next seven months dealing with the Girls insecurities about being a “Gay Oven” and their umbridge at the fact that there are men in this world who are unaffected by the powers of their boobs.
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You hit the toenail on the head….
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Greetings fellow Kiwi….
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