“You can’t go on birth control, your tits will get bigger than mine! We had a plan!” Does this plan involve small boobs and a baby?

“He said he was Spanish but not a Mexican. What the hell, that doesn’t even make sense!” It does to the entire country of Spain.

“This might be a stupid question–” Girls, there’s no such thing as a–“Do fish, like, drink water?” Never mind, stupid question.

“I saw my gyno at dinner with this really hot girl! Why am I jealous!?” Cause you realized you aren’t the only vagina in his life.

The family question: who will Charlie bring to his sister’s wedding? My response, “Can I bring both GAM or do I have to pick one?”