“My tarot card lady told me that babies bring people money. Maybe I should have one?” I see no harm in testing it out.

“So, my ‘Circumcised Penises Only’ streak is officially over.” Sorta sounds like when I made the switch from Legos to Playmobil’s.

“It’s official, I deleted my Facebook.” Nice, I have a lot of respect– “Luke and Sara went to Cancun!? Reactivate!” 14 seconds.

“Little bunny foo foo, hopping through the forest, jerking off the field mice and giving lots of head.” We had very different childhoods.

“He said he was French Canadian? Wait, France and Canada aren’t even near each other!” Wait, neither is Africa and America!